Hey guys.
It's been a while, hasn't it?
Let me explain what my life has been like lately: wake up, work, home, sleep, wake up, run, work, home, sleep, wake up, work, sleep, work, sleep, run, work, sleep, work, work, work.
Needless to say, I'm exhausted. Working 34 hours a week, when you're so used to working no more than 20 is tough stuff.
So what else have I been up to?
Well, first and foremost, I signed up for my first half marathon. January 29th at Disneyland. 5:30 AM. I'm totally excited and hopefully I can train up enough in time.
Also, I completely went through and edited my latest book. After I'm done with this, I'm going to put it into the computer and get ready to send it off to some agents. :) Also, it's pretty much the first time that I read through that book in completion: I love it.
I started a new book. So far, the prologue (a staple in my writing) is all I have done but it's all planned out in my head. I'm so excited to delve into it some more.
And lastly, I've been able to read some more books. Most recently, I've inhaled Newes from the Dead, the Hunger Games trilogy, and the Fallen series.
Newes from the Dead was OK. Nothing SPECTACULAR but a cute little stand-alone book. Great historical story.
Hunger Games....OMG. AMAZING. It's probably my 3rd favorite series, ever. Which is saying something considering the amount of books I've consumed over a lifetime. Basically, it's about a bunch of kids who are thrown into an arena to kill each other. Trust me. It's awesome.
Fallen & Torment (Fallen series) One word: meh. Like, okay, it's got a sort of interesting plot line. Fallen angels and reincarnation. Cool right? Yeah! Until you factor in the "romance" that's supposed to drive the plot forward. They're destined to be together. That part makes sense. But...they have no chemistry. None. She's just attracted to him and apparently has been for the last several thousand years.
I don't feel it!!!!!
I always enjoy reading so much because I can learn the different elements in stories that I like, that work. And then I can use those very same elements in my own writing.
Remember our woman power discussion? Well that still reigns true.
But this time I need to talk romance with y'all. I mean, any book or movie or play is only about two things at the core: death or sex. Nothing else.
(Most) humans crave a romance in a story. It drives everything forward, makes everything worth fighting for. And what can make this better if it is destined to be.
Come on, we all love fate.
What reading this series has taught me is that romance HAS to be totally believable. Legit. I think some authors have a problem with this because, in their minds, the destined romance seems totally real because they know everything about it. But they sort of forget to share it with the rest of us.
Romances can be destined.
Philosophers can debated this for centuries. I believe that there are things I am destined to do with my life. There are places that I will have no choice but to go to, whether by plan or by chance. People in this world who I'm supposed to meet and be friends or enemies with. I believe that there is one person, somewhere in this world, that I am ultimately destined to be with. I'm not alone in this belief.
So this is my next goal.
For this next book, I'm going to destiny, fate. My main character will have everything that she loves ripped from her, in order that she should discover the person she is meant to be. Discover her fate everything on her own.
Sort of how I'm planning on discovering my own.
Funny how all of this comes from reading a simple book, huh?
Showing posts with label death. Show all posts
Showing posts with label death. Show all posts
Monday, June 20, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Reincarnation.
I've been debating something over the past few days.
Let me start out by saying that my religious views vary. I find some sort of truth in nearly every faith...yet I find myself without one true religion (much to my family's dismay). I believe in a form of Higher Being, but I will leave it at that.
Because I don't know what really happens after death (none of us really do) I chose to lay my faith in the Buddhist belief in reincarnation...that when we die, we are reborn into a new form. While I don't agree with the grasshopper, fish, gorilla, or human idea of it...I do think that part of us comes from others.
Remember how in my first posting, I explained that I tend to have a different obsession every few months? Well, there is one particular point in history that I feel is an intimate part of me. More than just a simple interest...but rather like somewhere, in the deep crevices of my mind, I know that I've been there.
The Holocaust.
There's always been something so eerily familiar about that whole portion of WWII that has always struck a chord with me. I devoured books about this subject for years when I was younger. Even now I find myself being sucked into these tales. One particular reason that I believe what I do is because of a simple quote.
For years, I thought I had read it on the back of a book cover. It's a macabre scene of Nazi soldiers laughing at a group of children...their parents now departed. For years, I searched for this book. I went to every bookstore, and scoured the shelves of anything having to do for WWII. I went to the library and checked out nearly every book. But I could not find it. It's been more than 10 years and still nothing.
The scene is so vivid...so ingrained in my memory that I feel positive that it had to have happened.
And what if I didn't imagine it it? That's the question that's been nagging at me all this time. What if that was my memory?
I understand that I sound crazy. For all I know, I am.
But I have other points to ponder about. They always say that we are affected by those in our lives and that they make up a big part of who we are.
With that being said, I must also explain that my last remaining grandmother passed away two days ago. Before the condolences begin...I have to say that I am devoid of emotion on the subject. For the past 5 or 6 years, she has suffered from strokes, dementia, various forms of cancer, infections, disease, malnutrition, and terrible hospice care. She has had many close encounters with death. I learned to let go about 3 years ago when I stopped visiting her. Now she's finally out of pain.
My family is saying that I'm not upset because I didn't know her that well. But that's not really true. I did know her, even if it wasn't as well as the rest of my family. I think that she's truly affected my life, whether or not I realize it or not. She's now with the aunt I never met (due to her untimely death at age 13) and her own mother. Women who affected her life.
They are a part of me. Everything, whether or not we realize it or not, is a part of me. Perhaps I'm the reincarnation of Anne Frank (not that I try to sound egotistical). Perhaps the revival of my long departed aunt who had such a bright future ahead of her. Maybe a million different people are inside of me, effecting every movement I make. I am them and they are me.
I feel like I'm supposed to make a difference in this world. That something great it going to happen. I'm sure that many people feel that way, but I earnestly believe it. Some way or other, I'm meant to have the bright future of the people who were not able to live theirs out--like Anne and my aunt.
Perhaps that is what true reincarnation is: Not letting those who have passed down.
--Wendy
Let me start out by saying that my religious views vary. I find some sort of truth in nearly every faith...yet I find myself without one true religion (much to my family's dismay). I believe in a form of Higher Being, but I will leave it at that.
Because I don't know what really happens after death (none of us really do) I chose to lay my faith in the Buddhist belief in reincarnation...that when we die, we are reborn into a new form. While I don't agree with the grasshopper, fish, gorilla, or human idea of it...I do think that part of us comes from others.
Remember how in my first posting, I explained that I tend to have a different obsession every few months? Well, there is one particular point in history that I feel is an intimate part of me. More than just a simple interest...but rather like somewhere, in the deep crevices of my mind, I know that I've been there.
The Holocaust.
There's always been something so eerily familiar about that whole portion of WWII that has always struck a chord with me. I devoured books about this subject for years when I was younger. Even now I find myself being sucked into these tales. One particular reason that I believe what I do is because of a simple quote.
For years, I thought I had read it on the back of a book cover. It's a macabre scene of Nazi soldiers laughing at a group of children...their parents now departed. For years, I searched for this book. I went to every bookstore, and scoured the shelves of anything having to do for WWII. I went to the library and checked out nearly every book. But I could not find it. It's been more than 10 years and still nothing.
The scene is so vivid...so ingrained in my memory that I feel positive that it had to have happened.
And what if I didn't imagine it it? That's the question that's been nagging at me all this time. What if that was my memory?
I understand that I sound crazy. For all I know, I am.
But I have other points to ponder about. They always say that we are affected by those in our lives and that they make up a big part of who we are.
With that being said, I must also explain that my last remaining grandmother passed away two days ago. Before the condolences begin...I have to say that I am devoid of emotion on the subject. For the past 5 or 6 years, she has suffered from strokes, dementia, various forms of cancer, infections, disease, malnutrition, and terrible hospice care. She has had many close encounters with death. I learned to let go about 3 years ago when I stopped visiting her. Now she's finally out of pain.
My family is saying that I'm not upset because I didn't know her that well. But that's not really true. I did know her, even if it wasn't as well as the rest of my family. I think that she's truly affected my life, whether or not I realize it or not. She's now with the aunt I never met (due to her untimely death at age 13) and her own mother. Women who affected her life.
They are a part of me. Everything, whether or not we realize it or not, is a part of me. Perhaps I'm the reincarnation of Anne Frank (not that I try to sound egotistical). Perhaps the revival of my long departed aunt who had such a bright future ahead of her. Maybe a million different people are inside of me, effecting every movement I make. I am them and they are me.
I feel like I'm supposed to make a difference in this world. That something great it going to happen. I'm sure that many people feel that way, but I earnestly believe it. Some way or other, I'm meant to have the bright future of the people who were not able to live theirs out--like Anne and my aunt.
Perhaps that is what true reincarnation is: Not letting those who have passed down.
--Wendy
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